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Sometimes we forget those closest to us…

It is funny how quite often we tend to forget to praise and recognize those closest to us.  I had a particular man come into my life, nearly right from the dawn of Bipolar Babe…he never even met me and offered me his services, his office, ink from his printer, down to anything I needed to make it happen for the kids!  He overwhelmed me with his passion and generosity, I really did not think people like him existed.  I met with this fellow and he was shaky and meek but very keen to help me and Depressed Diva out.  His heart was in the right place and I was happy to have him aboard.  He told me that since being part of Bipolar Babe he now feels a spark in his life, like he is eager to push on with things.  He has created a marketing strategy and we have started to execute it by meeting with Alan Rycroft from the Kool Aid Society and he brought me to REES.  Even though he had been feeling quite bothered by his bipolar disorder he pushed on taking me around and helping me build valuable networks.  He is pulling together information to help Bipolar Babe thrive with possible funding and I know he will be key in helping me with the upcoming fundraiser.  This gentleman calls himself old and useless when he has been dedicated and amazingly reliable.  He is a key team player and I don't know where Bipolar Babe would be without him.  He is such an asset and his contribution helps further the cause for the kids and for that we are all grateful! This man's blog can be found here: http://www.schnerchpj.com/blogs/?p=243  You can purchase his book here: http://www.authorsden.com/visit/viewblog.asp?AuthorID=50684 Patrick Schnerch is a fabulous writer and has several published books, one that I am reading now and it is more raw and real than anything I have ever read – it is a piece of courage and hope.  He is a 'peaceful warrior' that is often sensitive and is way too hard on himself.  He does not see how talented he really is and how much I admire his awesome perseverance in life.  I just wish he would realize that his contribution in this world and to the bipolarbabe project is valuable and priceless and I love and appreciate him.  I look forward to having him on new tasks while recognizing his own efforts to complete yet another book in October.  He is interviewing me for the book and I feel so grateful to have the opportunity to help him further his own activist causes. I apologize to Patrick that I did not write this sooner.  I sometimes get caught up in all the amazing things happening in my life and tend to think that people just know how important they are to me, so now you know Patrick, Bipolar Babe loves ya and looks forward to pursuing the fight against stigma with you to make this world an accepting and understanding place to be for the youth and for everyone!  It has just begun and you and I are doing this together! Much Love xo     ~BABE

Doing it for the Kids!

 As many of you know I have been pondering whether to incorporate and become a nonprofit organization or remain a project for now.  I filled out all the paper work but something inside me was telling me to slow down…I tend to like things now now now!!  Then I slowed down a little tonight and met a lady named Lisa for a chai latte.  The moment I saw her I felt a sense of calm and her smile shared sincerity.  She locally leads The FORCE Society for Kids' Mental Health  http://www.bckidsmentalhealth.org/ This woman is AMAZING!!  Talk about living your life for a cause!!  Her dedication is admirable and with her personal experience of having children who have mental health issues, she took a difficult situation and found creative and meaningful ways to accommodate and help her children to live a plentiful and successful life.  She realized the value in reaching out to other parents and after years of selfless work for the cause of children and mental health, she is now contracted by FORCE to do what she loves-education and advocacy.  She is a wealth of information and knows the system inside and out.  It is so impressive!  As I listened to her share her story, I felt a certain authenticity that is so often absent.  I felt her passion and resilience and then I thought she reminded me of someone…me.  As we bounced off a gazillion ideas we were overwhelmed by the awesome impact that we could create together in the world of youth.  She absolutely loves Bipolar Babe and is offering me much needed help through invitations to make meaningful connections and has highlighted how our work could compliment each other.  She feels like an angel and I committ to help her so that we can further the cause together.  With education stigma will cease to exist! It's for the kids!

Being an Advocate and a Friend

I went and visited my mom today.  I saw her yesterday too and she was basically 'alive' but had no response-they call it catatonia.  I have never seen her like this before and it scared me tremendously!  As I held my mother she just stared at me with little or no response.  Today was better but she was not herself at all, and I barely see her the way I once knew her when I was young.  I was always embarrassed of my mother because I was never afforded the pleasure of someone educating me or offering me a detailed explanation of what was going on with her.  It was not until I was diagnosed with bipolar did I understand our shared illness.  I was pervaded by confusion and judgement when I possessed no knowledge about her illness and saw my mother as someone other than my mother…not the mother I knew.  She too has a rare form of the disorder that they can be barely treated due to the fact that all of our brains are so intricate but really they don't know what she has, they are just trying to help her.  There is no cure and we can hope for the best.  People often say they don't know their parent/relative/friend anymore after a breakdown and they will never be the same person they knew, but actually they are.  A mental illness or any illness is not who we are, it is what we have…my mother has always been my mother and nothing will ever change the fact that she always will be.  I gained a new appreciation for my mother today as I did her makeup and read her poetry…and encouraged her to write more.  I felt like I lost my mother yesterday as she failed to have any response, I got what it would be like to lose her…it killed me.  I am so thrilled to now be here for her and show her my love by conversation and being with her just enjoying her company.  Although shaky and spacey, she talked to me a lot today and I have really educated myself on our shared affliction as it allows me to understand better what she is going through and how the world may appear to her.  We never truly know, but if we try, we can get an idea and it creates a beautiful empathy and understanding. While I have been here this week, I have taken an active part in her recovery by learning about her medications, side effects and have even talked to her doctor and posed over 20 questions and I am working with her social worker to ensure she has everything she needs.  Today I have been in touch with records services in Ontario, inquiring about her passes to the lounge today and even to getting her toe nails cut.  I am learning what it is like to take an unmoveable stand for somebody.  Mostly learning about the illness itself is the first step.  I feel very blessed as she may be moved to Hillside Psych Hospital to a nicer facility and I know that I have been key in her recovery by taking an educated and proactive approach and that helps me feel close with her and eases with my heart.  I am so pleased to be staying longer because and spend more time aiding in her recovery.  Most of all I tell her I love her and prayer for her recovery and I hope you will too. 🙂 Babe 😉

Can't be Serious all the Time – Smoothie and the Couch!

She is already copywritten so she just stopped by to say HEY!!!

She is already copywritten so she just stopped by to say HEY!!!

I can’t believe what I just did!  I was sitting on the couch balancing my strawberry and banana smoothie on my belly as I chatted to my sister via phone and WHAM! …all to the side of me and down the inside of my leather couch!!  OMG!!!  Don’t worry I survived it!  lol Well today I operated on 4 hours sleep, finally slumbered at 6:30AM, it was definitely the bipolar.  I have been worrying about my ma again, she is in ‘lock up’ in the psych ward in Kamloops.  The lock up is the area where you have locks on your doors to keep you safe at night and you are not allowed to leave the hospital.  It is not as scary as it sounds.  My step-father called me last night and he was super depressed and bummed out.  I have never heard him sound so …depressed.  I went to bed around 12AM with thoughts racing through my mind and I concluded that getting my car this August is not as important as seeing mom this weekend.  I know $ will always come around to me somehow and frankly family is extremely important to me.  Westjet ain’t cheap, but heck it will be awesome to see mom’s face when I show up to bring her a smile.  I told daddio I would be there this Friday and I will come home Tuesday.  Things are a little rough in other parts of my life with love etc. but it is all a learning experience.  I would much rather feel anything than nothing at all!  I remember there were times when I could barely taste my food and getting out of the shower was a significant task accomplished for the day.  😛  It ain’t so bad, I trust in my higher power and really believe that all things have a way of harmoniously intertwining to weave into something great.  There are sometimes hurdles along the way, this is definitely one of them.  HUGS TO YOU ALL!!!